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Letting Suni Take Over

I’ve decided I want to start living intentionally. What does that mean, exactly? I’m on a work-related travel back to the gulf coast, around 2 hours from my parent’s house. It’s fantastic, and hopefully may turn into something more permanent.

It’s funny because I can see glimpses of what my life would be like, and I find that it has the potential to stay the same. I’m a creature of habit and responsibilities. I don’t deviate off the beaten path, I don’t do anything other than go to work and come home.

Today, though, I did something different. I took a right turn instead of heading straight back to my hotel and I spent about an hour wandering up and down the beach with my shoes in my hands. No matter that I was wearing my office clothes or that they got wet. I just went with it. And – here’s the kicker – I even took a back road back to my hotel.

I don’t have responsibilities here. I mean, work of course, but I don’t have to rush home. Once I’m at the hotel, I can leave if I want. If I move here, my dogs would live with my parents and I would commute Monday mornings and Thursday nights. That means I could be irresponsible and live in a studio condo on the beach during the week, even though hurricanes and whatnot.

All of this comes from letting go of my anxieties and letting Suni, the author and fearless person that lives in my head, take over. Her voice was silent for many years, but she’s getting stronger.

Not bug out and go to New Orleans to meet up with random guys strong. *coughyouknowhoyouarecough*

But, “hey, you should go to the beach now. Because why not” strong.

Which is surprising progress for me. And good things happen when I listen to Suni.

 

Published inSelf-Love
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